I log in to Facebook, my friend Rebecca messages me. At first I thought it was real, then I realized, “Oh, this is hilarious. THIS GUY IS A HACKER? USING FACEBOOK CHAT?”

How it went down:
Rebecca
Today

12:12pm
hi
how are you doing ?

Me: HEY, good, i just woke up, was up late, how the heck are you?

Scammer: am not good at the moment

Me: oh crap
What’s up?

Scammer: are you aware that am in uk ?

Me: NO
I just saw the baby pic post

Scammer: am stuck in uk

Me: I’ve been behind on my internets with thanksgiving week i was everywhere
How did that happen!?

Scammer: we went on a short vacation to visit resort and we got mugged last night at a gun point

Me: Holy fucking shit

Scammer: all cash, cell credit card was stolen off us
it was a brutal experience and scary

Me: I am stunned!
This is like something you hear in the papers

Scammer: thank God we still have our life and our passport saved

Me: No kidding, I can’t believe that, NICE VACATION
you’ll never leave the state again now
Man, what the hell you just had a baby

Scammer: our return flight leave in few hours…we need your urgent help at the moment
i need your help at the moment

Me: oh snap, did you just get hacked
who is this?
HELLO, mr hacker, who the hell are youuu
in nigeria?
you need money?

Scammer: yes

Me: lemme guess, need me to cash you a check?

Scammer: no…i need u to send me money

Me: because you’re rebecca

Scammer: poor man go to work

Me: Yeah I bet, but you’re barking up the wrong tree man, I’ve been dealing with hackers since I was 14
I’m not a complete idiot

Scammer: i dont have ur time
poor man go to work

Me: What does that even mean? Too poor for proper english skills, it’s a dead giveaway of a scammer
although, this is new, using someone’s facebook chat to get their friends to send money

–
So basically, this was new for me. I never USE FB chat. Now I see that was a SMART IDEA. My favorite part was that he ADMITTED it. Admitted and excused himself for his behavior.

If you guys have anyone you think is a good friend asking you for money on facebook, CALL THEM, make sure they aren’t a hacker. I know there are people who haven’t been around as long as I have online, or might honestly just think their friend is in dire need. And these are people who I really don’t want getting screwed over. DON’T SEND MONEY TO PEOPLE ON THE INTERNET, EVER EVER EVER. Lesson over.

Tags: facebook, hackers, nigeria, scammers, scams, uk